Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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