Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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