Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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