he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Randomize
