names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize