You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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