You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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