i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
