my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
