pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
