I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
