Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
So many bounce houses so little time
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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