Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
