I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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