I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
and you fell through a lawn chair
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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