hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
