My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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