I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
