Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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