gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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