It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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