Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I love you. Go after that dick
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
