you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
