I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
