I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
