Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
