if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize