so that wasnt chicken after all
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
