I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just gargled with NyQuil
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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