White coat. Heels.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize