i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Houston, we have a blender
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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