There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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