Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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