I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
