I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
