During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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