i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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