she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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