two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
