drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
