Where did you get a picture of my penis
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
