Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
