Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
