he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
