you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
