They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
