That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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