Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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