3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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