Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
