I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
